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Friday, 23 January 2015

THE 10 COMMANDMENTS OF A BLACK KID



·     If you want to reach 21 successfully this are the laws you should follow. This is also to show that being black is not easy. No racism here. Nooooooooooooooo. But white kids don’t know how good they have it. You get to go to the “special” corners, we get to go in to special comers. Keep one thing in mind as you read the following commandments though; I love my parents still, despite the hustle bellow.
·       Did you know that black children have a certain code or commandments they live by? Probably not. Even some black kids don’t know that these laws exist but still they follow them unknowingly. The following commandments are the ones that I managed to pick up during my time as a kid. I still follow them even now that am older. To my parents you are never too old to get your ass whooped.  For the record, THY means YOU.  Just saying.
This is sort of like your long walk to freedom
1.      Thy shall not talk back to thy parents. That is a no, no. unless you want your teeth to be knocked out or to be shaped like the number 33.
2.      Thy shall not still meat from thy mom’s pot. Unless thy ones to die and anonymous death.
3.       Thy shall not still meat/food and leave evidence tracing back to you, unless      thy feel like dying in your sleep, which according to my mom, that is getting off easy.
4.      Thy shall not insult your parents. Thy shall not do this or even dream about it. Thy should pray that thy mom don’t dream about you insulting her or thy not have a tomb stone or even a grave.  
5.      Thy shall not refuse to eat your mom’s food. Saying no to her food is like saying “she doesn’t know how to cook”. And saying she does not know how to cook means you are moving out. Just FYI, when I said no to my mom’s food, I ended up living with my friends. At their place.
6.      Thy shall not say “I hate you mom”. We all know that once in while we all hate our parents for some sh*t they did, BUT, not matter what; you never say these words to your parents face-to-face I-HATE-YOU. Keep in mind that thy are just a burden anyways, so if you say I hate you, she will says thank God, move out.
7.      Never slap your mom or your Dad. The green Hulk in the Avengers, is nothing as compare to what one of them might become. So to not make things even worst never do that.
8.       Be ready to be beaten at all times. The worst thing that could happen to you is to get an ass whooping when thy are not ready. Surprised ass whooping is bad for you growth towards 21.  Wake up every morning knowing that “OK today I might get some ass whooping”, it always good to think negative here. After all, constructive beating makes you stronger, so the enemies (parents) say.
9.      Never see thy parents as thy friends. If you see them as your friends, when they beat you, you will get angry and may do something stupid and that is just what we trying to avoid. You parents are not your friends and not your enemies either. In other words, your parents are the enemies you don’t get to hate.
10.  Thy shall not look at thy mother with an evil eye, like you are planning something evil against her. Well she will beat the evil out of you.
I wish you all the best in your long walk to freedom.

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